Mostly I am a “good enough” person. Since it’s my nature to be both a perfectionist and Type-A, this represents a major concession to life.
Some parts, like my hair style, became “good enough” very early on. My hair will not hold a curl for anything and so I wear it short.
My house has always suited family life over entertaining. We almost bought on two occasions houses with grand entertaining spaces, that would be for “perfect” lives. But I couldn’t see our family there.
Once I did try to go for perfect and shortly regretted it. I bought a Christmas dress for my youngest (who was 5) that today you would call “Pinterest perfect.” It was the kind of dress the children in those perfect family Christmas portraits wear. She got milk on it, creating a stain the first time she wore it.
I’ve been thinking about this because I worry that social media, especially pictures on them, are encouraging us to go after “Pinterest perfect” instead of allowing is to enjoy fully the needlepoint we love.
This does not mean you shouldn’t do the best you can and it doesn’t mean you should stop learning and improving. If you strive for the mythical “perfect” you will find that you don’t measure up and that stitching is no longer a pleasure.
It does mean the stuff happens: the thread gets knotted, it isn’t quite thick enough to cover perfectly, or the shape you drew is weird (all these things have happened to me on Sunday), so don’y get hyper over it.
It does mean that you should relax and do what you love. There will always be things you don’t like and can’t do. I cannot stitch on Congress Cloth. I spent too much money and too much frustration pursuing this before I realized it made me unhappy. I don’t do these projects because I can’t even be good enough at them and stitching should make you happy.
Rest content in the good things you can achieve.
Very few of us will ever have magazine bodies (even models don’t), nor will our stitching be perfect. We will, ultimately, define what is “good enough’ for us. That’s where we should live, do our stitching, praise God, and be happy.
Our levels are all different, and that’s OK, because we stitch for love, for creativity, and for relaxation.
This really works because I have seen it and I’ll share the story with you. Many years ago I was in my dentist’s waiting room. I was stitching away while my kids were at their appointments, probably on something small but complex. An elderly lady came in and saw me stitching. With a huge smile she said she did needlepoint too and showed me her current project. It was on large-mesh canvas and had many visible mistakes and skipped stitches. But she was proud of it and the happiest stitcher I have ever seen.
At the time I was still pursuing perfection and “having it all.” I was horrified but too polite to do much. But that woman’s joy in stitching has stayed with me all these years because she really knew what stitching was all about.
And isn’t that more important than perfection?
About Janet M Perry
Janet Perry is the Internet's leading authority on needlepoint. She designs, teaches and writes, getting raves from her fans for her innovative techniques, extensive knowledge and generous teaching style. A leading writer of stitch guides, she blogs here and lives on an island in the northeast corner of the SF Bay with her family
judy fenner says
I really believe this and tell everyone that I want to provide canvas for everybody – so I carry inexpensive to expensive and my customers are all happy no matter which one they are working on
Yes, we try new things and sometimes we just stick to our normal stitch, but we enjoy and relax
Thank you for saying so.